Willingness: The Doorway Out of Fear
Facing Fear at 30,000 Feet
Recently, my girlfriend and I took a trip to Santa Fe, New Mexico—a truly lovely destination that I can't recommend enough. Our journey began in Miami, included a layover in Dallas, and totaled about five hours of flying time. This detail is crucial because, for someone with a severe fear of flying like myself, each hour in the air is an hour of vulnerability.
Even on calm days, the mere thought of flying conjures terrifying scenarios in my mind. What if the plane were to nosedive? Or what if it flipped over midair due to extreme turbulence? These images haunt me long before I even reach the airport.
Despite these fears, I've been working on mindfulness and meditation, and I saw this trip as the perfect opportunity to practice. The flights to Santa Fe were surprisingly smooth, allowing me to focus more on the experience of the trip itself. However, it was on our return journey that I truly confronted my fear.
Confronting the Storm
After an unexpected detour through Pensacola due to a missed connection in Dallas, we were faced with storm clouds and mild turbulence. As the plane shook, my anxiety surged, and I found myself gripping the armrests, my eyes fixed on the stormy view outside.
In that moment, I caught myself spiraling and asked a profound question, "How do we find peace from here?" Practicing mindfulness in safe, comfortable settings is beneficial, but nothing compares to real-world challenges.
"What am I truly afraid of?" I pondered. The fear of dying in a crash seemed to be the root cause, stripping me of any semblance of control. Recognizing this, I asked another question, "From this place of fear, how can I find peace?"
The Power of Willingness
Sitting with my fear, a realization dawned on me: I am not willing to die. This unwillingness to accept death was the resistance fueling my fear. I sat there, contemplating the notion of willingness—a powerful, open energy that might allow me to overcome my fear.
"If I were willing to die, what fear could possibly remain?" This question shifted my perspective entirely. I meditated on this idea and gradually began to feel an opening within. By accepting the possibility of death, the details of my fear—turbulence, obscured views, even the entire scenario of crashing—lost their grip on me.
Embracing willingness transformed my experience. The bumps, the clouded views, even the thought of the plane window closing became mere elements of my journey, no longer chains that bound me. Surrendering to the moment, I found freedom.
Finding Peace Through Willingness
This trip taught me that true peace comes from willingness. By opening ourselves to our deepest fears, we can witness life's turbulence not as a threat, but as part of the vast tapestry of experiences we're here to observe. As we continue our journeys, both in the air and on the ground, the question remains: are we willing to face our fears and find freedom within them?
Engage with Your Fear
As you reflect on the themes of this post, I encourage you to engage directly with your own fears. This practical exercise can help deepen your understanding of willingness and its transformative power in confronting fear.
Reflective Exercises
Identify Your Fear: What is one fear that holds you back in your daily life? It could be a fear of public speaking, fear of failure, or even a fear of flying, similar to my own experience. Write it down.
Explore the Fear: Ask yourself, "What am I truly afraid of?" Dive deep into the root causes of this fear. Is it a lack of control, fear of embarrassment, or something else? Understanding the underlying fears can illuminate pathways to overcome them.
Challenge Your Willingness: Consider how being willing or unwilling to face this fear affects your life. What would change if you embraced willingness? Reflect on how this shift could transform your experience the next time you encounter this fear.
Mindfulness Moment: Next time you feel this fear, pause and take a mindful moment to observe your thoughts and feelings without judgment. This practice can help you detach from the immediate emotional responses and see your fear from a new perspective.
Share and Connect
After completing these exercises, I invite you to share your insights in the comments below or on social media. Discussing your experiences with others can be incredibly supportive and enlightening. How does facing your fears with a mindset of willingness change the way you experience these moments? What steps are you taking to cultivate peace and freedom in the face of fear?
