Self-Inquiry 101
Self-Inquiry: A Path to Inner Peace
I’ve been reflecting lately on what it really means to practice self-inquiry, especially when it comes to navigating emotions like unhappiness. If you’ve ever felt stuck in a loop of negative feelings or thought patterns, you might be wondering: how do we actually inquire into ourselves? I’ll walk you through this process because it’s something I’m still learning too, and it’s been incredibly eye-opening.
The Idea Behind Self-Inquiry
Let’s say you’re feeling unhappy, and on the surface, it seems like the unhappiness is caused by something external — maybe a relationship or a situation at work. Normally, we’d try to fix the external issue, right? But the approach of self-inquiry is different. Instead of focusing on changing the outside world, you turn your attention inward and ask, “Who is this ‘I’ that is unhappy?”
The truth is, this unhappiness is not new. You’ve felt it before, in different situations, for different reasons. If the same feeling keeps coming up in various contexts, then no single external cause can be the real source of it. This is where the inquiry begins — you start to question who is actually experiencing this unhappiness. Who is this "I" that feels it?
Who Am I?
When you say “I,” what are you really talking about? At first glance, it might seem like you're referring to your body, your thoughts, your feelings — the whole package that makes up “you.” But look closer: your thoughts come and go all the time, right? One minute you’re thinking about what to have for dinner, the next you’re worrying about a deadline. Yet, you remain. You’re aware of these thoughts, but you’re not made of them.
The same goes for feelings. Maybe you feel lonely, insecure, or like you’re not enough. These feelings can feel intense, but they don’t stick around forever. They pass, yet you remain. You’re aware of them, but they aren’t the core of who you are.
Even physical sensations come and go. Rub your hands together — you're aware of that sensation, but once you stop, the sensation fades. But you don’t disappear with it, do you? Again, you remain. You aren’t defined by these sensations, just as you're not defined by passing thoughts or fleeting emotions.
The Big Realization
As you dig deeper, you start to realize that who you truly are is not this ever-changing mix of thoughts, feelings, and sensations. What you are is the awareness that experiences these things — the awareness that notices them come and go. This is where the big shift happens. You realize that the "I" you've been referring to all your life isn’t this bundle of thoughts and emotions. It's the steady awareness that’s always been there, quietly in the background, observing everything.
So, What About Unhappiness?
When you take a good look at your experience of unhappiness, what is it? It’s just a bunch of thoughts and feelings passing through you. But if you’re not your thoughts and feelings, who is really unhappy? The true "I," this pure awareness, can’t actually be unhappy because it’s untouched by those passing mental states.
Once you realize this, something interesting happens. The unhappiness starts to fade because you’re no longer identifying with it. You stop mistaking yourself for the passing storm of thoughts and emotions. And what’s left when the storm passes? It’s peace. That peace is happiness.
Returning to Inner Peace
Here’s the beautiful part: once you’ve touched this inner awareness, you can return to it whenever you want. At first, you might only visit it when you’re really feeling unhappy, but the more you recognize this peaceful awareness as your true self, the more you’ll want to live from that place. You’ll stop getting caught up in the highs and lows of your thoughts and emotions because you’ll see them for what they are — passing clouds in the sky of your awareness.
In this discovery, you realize that your unhappiness was never really caused by the external world. It was caused by mistaking yourself for a collection of thoughts and feelings. But the more you inquire, the more you uncover the peaceful awareness that’s always been there, beneath it all. And that’s where real happiness lives.
I invite you to explore this for yourself — to question who you are when unhappiness arises, and see if you can find that space of peace within you. Because when you do, it changes everything.
Try It for Yourself
If this idea of self-inquiry resonates with you, why not give it a try? Next time you’re feeling overwhelmed or stuck in a negative emotion, pause for a moment and ask yourself, Who is the one experiencing this? Don’t rush the answer — just sit with it. Notice how your thoughts and feelings come and go, but there’s something within you that stays steady, something that simply observes. That’s the awareness we’re talking about. The more you get to know it, the more you might find that inner peace you’ve been searching for.
